Who would have thought an Ayn Rand-themed video game with old-timey diving suits and weird drill arms was a recipe for success? No, wait. You know what? Who wouldn’t
have thought that was a recipe for success? Bioshock has been a creepy hit and its fans have been subjecting themselves to being scared out of their minds ever since. And fans of the show, the ones who can’t get enough of the world, can pick up all sorts of great Bioshock merchandise to indulge their love of weird cities and underwater adventures. Hooray!
Probably the coolest things you’ll find are the Bioshock action figures, but there are plenty more fun toys and gifts out there for the fans to enjoy, from truly terrifying Bioshock merch to adorable plush dolls. Sometimes, they’re the same thing. Below you’ll find a handpicked list of 10 great gifts; not a comprehensive list, but rather a best-of.
Bioshock Merchandise: A top 10 gift list
1) Big Daddy Figurine
Kicking things off with the most adorable mascot the video gaming world has ever seen (take THAT, Mario!), we've got the Big Daddy. The Daddy of all Bioshock characters. The father of all Rapture. From the fatherland.
Alright, no more daddy jokes. Those are lame. But anyway, this high-quality Big Daddy figurine is destined to be the centerpiece of whichever shelf is gloriously bestowed with its greatness.
This one is often in somewhat difficult-to-get supply, so don't be too afraid if it isn't as available as you might like. Used items are popular options, but remember that there's a whole ocean of Bioshock figurines to love and to hold for your adorable Bioshock-loving pleasure.
I picked this one to kick off the list because he's the iconic centerpiece of the artwork of the original game, and, quite frankly, I think he's the most awesome.
2) Big Sister Figurine
I can't quite conclude whether the Big Sister is scary and gangly, or lithe and athletic. Perhaps some bizarre combination of both. I just can't quite figure it all out. But then again, not being able to figure out what in the world is going on is a signature Bioshock nightmare-creating technique.
But at any rate, the Big Sister figurine is a spectacular accompaniment to the Big Daddy action figure pictured above, like the Yang to its Yin...or the other way...I'm not sure. But anyway, it's pretty great. The technical details on today's action figures puts our childhood to shame.
This is another popular figurine from the Bioshock world, so once again, used bight be the only way to get them, but occasionally you'll see them turn up for not-particularly-atrocious prices. And it's the next step in collecting them all. Go on. You know you want to.
3) Figurine and Mask Gift Set
I'm including this here, because although you can get the deep sea diver guy on its own without needing the whole set, this is where to get the Splicer mask. Once again, this is sort of a semi-limited availability gift set, but I wanted to list it here because it's tricky to find this mask just on its own, and I wanted to include it.
I've seen Donnie Darko more than I've played Bioshock, so I still see the scary bunny mask whenever I look at this thing, but of course, it'll terrify you in whichever way is most suited to you personally.
It'll also double as a creepy Halloween Venetian mask sort of thing. Masquerade party!
But anyway, it's also got the Subject Omega figurine and a Little Sister doll, so you can expand your action figure collection to your heart's content.
4) Plush doll
So there's really nothing out there that says cozy bedtime snuggles better than Bioshock and ethically questionable scientific experimentation. Duh!
That creepy baseball head and all the wires remind me a whole lot of the "bad guy" action figures from Toys. Remember those creepy little buggers? This guy would be right at home with them.
This isn't the only plush doll available for Bioshock fans, but once again, availability wins. And even this one is somewhat tricky to find as well.
Sorry for all the difficult-to-find suggestions, but I had to suggest the best ones, right?
This is going to look right at home next to all the other plush toys you might have. And it'll certainly get a whole lot more attention than a Winnie the Pooh doll or whatever.
5) Splicer Welder Mask
You know how hard it is to build a Bioshock costume? Pretty damn hard. No wonder they're not selling Big Daddy costumes
all over the place. Too bad for everyone who wanted to be a Big Daddy for Halloween. You know how awesome that would be? Pretty spectacularly awesome, that's how awesome.
But you can get the next best thing...sort of...this is pretty quick and easy solution to the problem of high-quality costuming, and although you'll be on your own from the neck down, at least this'll look great.
I expect a lot more people will end up leaving it as a creepy shelf decoration, but of course, that's up to you. I also think it would make a great roommate-scaring device if you just walk around with it on the middle
of the night with no explanation whatsoever. Go on! It'll be fun!
This'll also double as a nice Dexter prop. Well, not all that well, but whatever. It'll do if no one inspects it carefully!
But anyway, it's yet another scary prop from the wonderful world of terrifying Bioshock gear, and it has the decorative look of what you've seen in the game. The weathered appearance makes for a nicely realistic prop.
Added bonus? It also lights up. The LED lights on the inside are battery-operated. So you can jab yourself with it AND use it as an impromptu flashlight! Win win!
It also makes a nice mantle decoration. In fact, all of these toys do, so your bookshelf is going to be pretty filled with Bioshock gear by the time we're through.
7) Rapture Poster
Anybody else noticing the trend of in-game or in-movie elements breaking out into the real world? It's a trend of which I thoroughly approve.
Rapture is one of those in-game elements that looks perfectly believable when you bring the propaganda art style into the real world. This is a perfectly plausible image that would-be utopian governments would totally put up all over town.
There are quite a few Rapture posters, and I'd certainly recommend taking a look at each and every one of them, but I picked this one because it's bright, iconic, and has a nice classic touch. I think, anyway.
I think it makes for a more interesting poster than the "regular" game posters featuring digital artwork. This one looks like "real" poster, not a video game poster, and makes Rapture all the more real.
8) Big Daddy T-shirt
So you'll get called Daddy. Nevermind. That's lame. I've never seen the appeal.
But I like this one. It looks like a snazzy geometric design, and doesn't announce its video gaminess. I like it better that way, because it's a very obvious hint to those who know what's going on, but it's a super secret pattern that no one else can possibly understand.
I recommend coming up with a fun game to describe what it might be, when people ask. Say it's an orbital probe or whatever. Or maybe a revolutionary golf ball design. Whatever! Have fun!
Speaking of fun, the design for the ladies is somewhat more...fun. Of a certain kind.
9) (Big) Daddy's Girl T-shirt
Yup, you guessed it. A Daddy's Girl T-shirt. Bioshock style.
Yes, you too can declare yourself as a Daddy's Girl, but in this particular fashion. It's probably going to be a little awkward when other people make weird assumptions, which is why this works out a whole lot better if worn only around other gamers, but if you don't care one little bit about what society thinks, well then, go right ahead.
You know what else is great? You and your special someone can get matching Big Daddy t-shirts and go as a couple. He can get the Big Daddy t-shirt, and you can get the Daddy's Girl t-shirt. That way you'll be yet another sappy couple with a couple's costume, but incredibly geeky at the same time, which usually makes it all better.
10) Art of Bioshock Infinite
So this one is probably a little more...intellectually
stimulating than some of the other ones. I mean, I like
the other ones, but this is for the artists out there. You can dig into the artistic style of the game, which, as we all know, was pretty great. It was different from a whole lot of other games, and managed to have its own personality, alongside all the other games that were just boring shooters that all looked the same.
The book itself is specifically centered around Bioshock Infinite, so it may have different material than someone might expect if it had been a Bioshock book, but whatever. Bioshock Infinite had plenty of style to go along with it too. Perhaps more so.
It's the sort of thing that'll be a great coffee table book in the living room of a decked out gamer paradise.